For many young children, pre-school is their first foray out into the real world. Before they enter the pre-school classroom, many children are used to having mom, dad, a grandparent or a close friend with them for comfort. Pre-school can seem quite scary to a young child who is not used to being left without a familiar face around them. If you have a shy child, it can be even worse.

So what should you do to your child make the transition into pre-school? Here are some tips that may help:


– Talk with your child

Once you decide that it is time to enroll your child in pre-school, sit down and explain it to him or her. Since most enrollment sessions are well ahead of the actual school start date, you will have many months to help your child get used to the idea of going to school. Tell your child about all of the exciting things that he or she will learn about. Take your child to pick out a special book bag or back pack that he or she can take to school.

– Meet the teacher beforehand and attend an open house with your child if possible.

Most pre-schools offer open house sessions where a parent can accompany his or her child on the first day. Do not miss this session. It is an important step in helping your child to become familiar with the new surroundings, while still having you close by. Be sure that you and your child spend time talking to the teacher together. Your child will see that the teacher is someone that you like and trust.

– Comfort your child, but be firm

The first day of pre-school is a notoriously tearful day. Your child may not want to let go of your hand when you go to drop him or her off. Your child may even try to cling onto your leg as you leave. Hug your child and explain that parents don’t go to pre—school. Help your child to understand that you will be back soon. Resist the urge to follow your child into the classroom. Pre-school teachers are very experienced in calming crying children.

– Keep in touch with the teacher daily.

While drop off and pick up time can be hectic, try to touch base with your child’s teacher after each class, especially if your child seems to be having a hard time adjusting. You will then be able to address any concerns as they occur.

– Check to see if the school has a website

Many pre-schools have websites where teachers can post information about the things that the children are learning about. Try to find out what stories and songs your child has learned. Encourage your child to sing the songs at home and hang up take-home artwork in a prominent place. This will show your child that you are interested in what he or she is learning about and that you are proud.

– Invite a friend from school over to your house

Part of the “scariness” of pre-school is that your child may feel alone. Even at the tender age of 3 or 4, your child may feel that the other children don’t include him or her (this is especially true if your child is shy). Help your child to make friends by inviting classmates to your home. Individual play dates are a great way for your child to get to know the other children without distractions. Try to befriend some of the parents of your child’s classmates as well– it’s a good way to get another point of view on how things are going at school and you may make a friend out of the deal as well.

– When necessary, admit that you child may not be ready

Some children just don’t have the social and listening skills that are needed for pre-school. Children under the age of 3 may have an especially difficult time adjusting. If you have placed a child this young in pre-school, you may want to ask yourself why. Is it because all of your neighbor’s kids are in pre-school? Do you feel that you “have” to put your child in school for fear that he or she will be “behind” the other children if you don’t? Don’t succumb to the pressure you may feel from other parents. Only you know what is best for your child.

Finally, is your child the youngest of the bunch? Perhaps your child just turned three at the pre-school cut-off date and is close to a full year younger than some of the other children in his or her class. If so, he or she may be struggling and may benefit from another year at home with mom or dad.

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